The Four L's of the High School Reunion

Opening Night of the Class of 1983

I never thought I would be blogging “real-time” from my 30^th reunion, but after attending the first night's festivities, I was overwhelmed with positive feedback, so I will try again.

[Note:  we'll see how many people really follow-up with a view at this installment; now that we’ve all come here to Dallas to celebrate our 30^th reunion. The build-up is over, the event has kicked-off!

The comments on Facebook© this morning speak to a lot of this; it was funny how so many drank a little too much, and thought the music was too loud?!]

I was blown away. For a group pushing 50, everyone looked very good. Too busy living life to focus on this reunion as much as the two previous reunions; I perceived the Thursday night group was as pure as I can expect for a group of Highland Parkers. Maybe it was the lack of spouses at the event last night, but it got real in a hurry.

My impression was that raising your kids in Highland Park was not as big a priority as the last time we met. In 2003, it seemed a badge of honor to afford, live, and send your kids to Highland Park schools.

This time, it seemed that people were just glad to be in attendance; notwithstanding the neighborhood in which they lived. Much of the conversation was going back to the points together in school, just as much as what we do in the present day.

The fact that so many people thanked me personally for writing what I thought about the approach to this 30th reunion shows me that the space between our lives is smaller than we think. This is a breakthrough weekend.

On the drive into Dallas, the satellite radio “oldies channel” prepared me for the thoughts I had tonight. The period music took me back to the places where it played as a soundtrack to high school. The time in the presence of my old friends did the same thing.

Quick thoughts about “expectations” for those who are coming in today:

Just hug your friends, everyone deserves a good hug. It’s been too long

Listen for those dramatic turning points in their story where life turned on a dime

Tell your story in a few words, respecting the difficulties that brought your friends to this place; they are just as important facts as yours

Parents love to talk about their kids! Listen to the “child stories” and re-live the joy of mothers and fathers; so many have watched their babies grow up and leave the nest

Acknowledge the pain, and the joy that your friend endured or celebrated in order to arrive at this place tonight

I want to specifically remember something about another person and our time together in school, thirty years ago; especially so I can thank them for what they did to make it so fun back in the 70s and 80s. The world was such a different place and the culture dealt with fewer deep issues, in my opinion.

Listen. Laugh. Love. Live. Those four L’s are the touch-points of this reunion.

See you tonight at the P.

©Mark H. Pillsbury

8 Weeks to Decide

Today's thoughts on eight (8) weeks to decision 2012:

©Bob Simpson/Chicago

With almost 20,000 homeless children in New York City, which is the highest number since the great depression, and 400,000 school kids cut loose in Chicago today b/c their teachers will not teach, I am deeply concerned about these examples of “at-risk” young people in America.

With per capita-GDP (per worker/gross domestic product) still 1.9% below 2007 levels enjoyed before the recession, and 8 million people out of work but not counted as unemployed, because they stopped looking for work, my concern for our country grows today. People are getting by with less or nothing.

With a new record national debt reaching $16 Trillion last Friday and over 30% of our IOUs held by the Social Security Trust Fund (literally borrowing against our future), it is no wonder the approval rating for our government is only at 30% favorable. Government spending has reached epic proportions, outstripping the revenues it collects and forcing higher deficits. This civic course is unsustainable.

photo by Luis Robayo ©AFP/GettyImages

With military deaths from suicide outweighing combat deaths by a two-to-one ratio this year, and two consecutive years of Pentagon budget cuts over $525 Billion, I am deeply concerned about the quality of life for our most dedicated public servants in uniform.

With the 2012 drought estimated to cost close to $80 Billion in related losses, second only to the 1988 drought, and next to Hurricane Katrina, and USDA rating 50% of the 2012 corn crop "poor" or "very poor;" there are thousands of food producers and farmers with dry ground and crumbling budgets this year. The long-term effects may rival the Dust Bowl era, and we consumers will be hit also.

I don’t know whether these separate problem-sets inter-lock, but there are large sectors of the population that are hurting today like no other time in American history, and as a patriotic citizen I hurt with them in a real way. I too am looking for a better opportunity.

Although I recognize that our history includes many dark chapters and times of uncertainty, today I find no comfort in the past. Today, I feel pain, and I am fearful that many forces of evil are intermeshed within these intractable problems. Sometimes I cannot sleep for worrying.

In my huge city, traffic snarls, crime surges, and the economic recovery is slower than expected. Due to economic pressures, too many families missed a vacation this summer, and there hasn’t been a pay raise in years. The question of “quality of life” weighs heavy on my heart this morning.

Our receptivity to change at this crossroads time in American history has to be significant, and the national election is just eight (8) weeks away. This is a decision-point. Nevertheless, the divide between candidates, worldviews, and political persuasions seems like a massive chasm. The election will swing on those who are currently “undecided,” independent, or never have voted before. These groups seem invisible at this point, but they will decide which direction the country turns.

New Hampshire by ©KALIM SALIBA

Each candidate will try to reach 270 electoral votes on Nov. 6 and the decision comes down to trust, confidence, and one’s outlook on the future. Doesn’t the voting decision relate to the value the administration has added or detracted over this past four (4) year term, the confidence that the leadership and plans exhibited are acceptable this time, and/or whether or not the voter feels like they are confident that they will be better off with one of the candidates as chief executive going forward?

Additionally, both parties have full slates of leaders farther down the ballot up for election in both state and federal legislatures, an important component to governance. Which President would work best with those groups? It is momentous to think about, and there isn't much more time.

I realize there are dozens of issues not mentioned here that resonate with numerous different voting blocs, especially those in the “social” category, like healthcare, abortion, or gay-marriage, but I do not have the space or time to argue those. The point is that I am very concerned with the quality-of-life in our country, and one of the big turning points in our civic life which might affect these problems, is right over the next hill. This is a time of deep contemplation and prayer for the future of our beloved nation, and I hope you share this perspective in your own way and I would invite you to comment herein below.

©Mark H. Pillsbury

Reflections on Hurricane Ike

written September 16, 2008
©Mark H. Pillsbury

(Houston, TX) Aftermath of Hurricane Ike:

I watched Hurricane Ike come through the neighborhood from the comfort of a wing-back chair. Even though the storm windows on the front of the house performed flawlessly under heavy fire, the long night witnessing the storm’s destructive power was in retrospect, dangerous. However, the past few months have been times of both reflection and danger for me. Spending five lonely hours watching the eye-wall continue to pound our little street in Houston, I reflected on a stay in the hospital in 2007 wondering, “Why God brings difficulties into our lives?”

John 15:2 Every branch in me that does not bear fruit he takes away, and every branch that does bear fruit he prunes, that it may bear more fruit.

During trials, God prunes us like a tree, even though at the time pruning seems painful, it allows one to become stronger and able to produce more in the long term: to be more fruitful for His purposes. The concept of spiritual discipline is not very popular, but it is apparent to me over the last year how God’s providence in pruning can lead to better living.

The process of getting in shape is slow and painful. By gradually losing weight and eating right, God transformed my body; I not only feel better but my long-term health is improved. Daily pruning off bad habits, over the course of a year, not only increased longevity but gave me a fresh outlook on life. Even more, my family did not just witness this blessing but participated in it. During this period of change it was apparent that God is a faithful, but pruning God; constant like a rock but allowing our world to evolve. He is a God of change and hope and new beginnings (as Paul wrote to Ephesus, “You can start living an entirely new life, as a person regenerated…”). The Gospel gives us the chance at new life in Him if we believe by faith alone.

"It takes courage to push yourself to places that you have never been before....to test your limits....to break through barriers. And the day came when the risk it took to remain tight inside the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom." –Anais Nin

Thoughts on my favorite tree

There is one tree in our front yard; a majestic southern live-oak tree that my old neighbor says grew from a solitary acorn. It was just me and my tree during that dark storm. Sheltered inside my house, I watched her fight with Ike all night long. The oak tree did gyrations and swayed in the wind, slapping, twisting and contorting in extremes I thought impossible to survive. At times the branches looked like strands of spaghetti, boiling in a pot, whirling like a dervish! However, after all the swaying subsided, there was only one branch hanging loosely from her limbs. There were many trees in our neighborhood with dozens of branches littering their yard, but not ours. If any neighbor could assess this tree like God can, in geological time, they would see it leap out of the ground and turn to the sun and spread its arms and bask in the joys of being an oak tree in Texas. (thanks, Marilynne Robinson).

"A dictator sees the truth as a matter or will; anything he says or dreams is the absolute truth and soon the people are forced to go along with him.

For the so-called democrat, the truth is the will of the people. Whatever the majority says is the law and that law becomes the truth for the people.

But for men like us, the only truth is the truth of the tree. All trees. Because the truth of the tree is its roots in the ground, and the wind blowing, and the rain falling. The sun is the tree's truth, and even if it is cut down his seed will scatter and those roots will once again take hold." --Tolstoy McGill

In the five years we have lived in our house we paid expert arborists to prune our lone live-oak twice. These were expensive and painful but all the unnecessary branches were taken away and the strength of the tree grew until she was ready when the real trial came. When light finally broke the horizon and the worst of Ike moved on, the large canopy drooped all the way down so her branches almost touched the ground. I never saw a living thing so tired from fighting, yet so proud to have survived. There was quite a scattered mess in our front yard, but the branches and limbs I cleaned up were not from the tree pruned, they were from trees not so well prepared.

Thoughts on the future of Houston

The city can take two paths during the aftermath. One is outward, blame-centered, and passive. The other is an active, self-sustaining, collaborative time of healing and growth over the next year, a chance at a new beginning. My hope is the city can focus on the priorities of its citizenry and prune away the petty arguments and wasteful bureaucracy hindering the execution of the city’s daily priorities. Many neighborhoods discovered unity after they were all leveled by the storm, living two weeks without power connected to their homes. The cooperative force of political leaders working together for provision of city services inspired the citizenry, and showed us the best purpose of government.

"The flight crowd is created by a threat. Everyone fleas; everyone is drawn along. The danger which threatens is the same for all. People flee together b/c it is best to flee that way. They feel the same excitement and energy of some increases the energy of others; people push each other along in the same direction. So long as they flee together they feel the danger is distributed..." --Elias Canetti (Crowds & Power 1960) [reminded me of *Hurricane Rita* when the whole city left and nothing happened]

Unlike New Orleans, this city has already rolled up its sleeves and started the entrepreneurial work that rebuilding and re-visioning requires. Instead of feeling sorry for ourselves, Houston begins the cleanup with the mindset that it could have been a lot worse; and we will patiently work until life is back to normal and the economic engines of this great city churn again. Like live-oak trees, all of us were severely pruned during Hurricane Ike, but this trial in the end will be thought of as a good thing. One day we will tell of how we rose out of the rubble and blossomed into a better place, one more fruitful for future generations.

If peace be in the heart,
The wildest storm is full of solemn beauty,
The midnight flash but shows the path of duty,
Each living creature tells some new and joyous story,
The very trees and stones all catch a ray of glory,
If peace be in the heart.
--Charles Francis Richardson